I didn't realize it, but my body was screaming for attention. I had started noticing a recurring feeling like I was short of breath - like no matter how deeply I inhaled, I couldn't get a full breath. It was a scary feeling, and as a yoga teacher I was sure there must be something physically wrong with my lungs, because of course I knew how to take a deep breath! After a while I started having daily and then almost constant headaches, and frequent spells of vertigo soon followed. I had no idea what was causing my symptoms. I saw multiple doctors, continued to have tests, but no one could find a physical cause for my issues. Nothing could help me get relief.

Burnout is one of those things that western medicine just doesn't really understand. There are often a wide variety of symptoms that can accompany it, including shortness of breath and headaches like mine, but also brain fog, chronic fatigue, body aches and pains, muscle tension, and chronic inflammation (which can lead to a whole host of other issues including heart disease). Emotionally, you might notice yourself unable to find joy in the everyday, losing your motivation and drive, having more difficulty finding purpose in your daily activities. Anxiety and depression may accompany the burnout.

With the help of a new doctor who finally understood what was going on with me, and consultations with a therapist and a somatic nervous system regulation expert, I was able to accept that what was happening was actually my body issuing louder and louder cries for help. I was incredibly lucky to have the support of my partner and my family, who swooped in to take everything off my plate while I took steps towards healing. I've spent the past 18+ months in recovery, and here are the things I prioritized to help heal my nervous system and rebuild my resilience:

Rest

With the help of my family, I was able to spend a *lot* of time in the early weeks just resting. I took long daily baths, I vegged on the couch watching sitcoms, I slept 9+ hours per night, I read comforting novels by a beloved author. I also started seeing a massage therapist who specialized in healing nervous system dysregulation and cranio-sacral therapy, and she was able to reduce the severity of my headaches and vertigo while quieting my nervous system. I recognize that I am very fortunate to have extended health care that covers massage therapy, because I have been able to make massage a non-negotiable which I continue to regularly make time for my schedule.

Meditation

I have never been "good" at meditation. But I found an awesome app called Balance with hundreds of guided meditations, many grouped into 10-day programs that allowed for cultivation of specific meditation practices such as breathing exercises, that were easy to follow and gave me a sense of direction and growth in my practice. I started with 5 minutes per day, and worked my way up to 15 (which for now is my optimal achievable length of a meditation session).

Movement

After reading Burnout by Emily & Amelia Nagoski, I really understood just how important exercise was for stress relief. Burnout explains how exercise allows your body to complete the stress cycle and actually release stress that can be built up in your body. I chose an activity that I have long loved, but had neglected since becoming a mother: long-distance running. Half hour runs along our beautiful downtown waterfront walkway allowed me to breathe in the ocean air, connect with other walkers and runners along the path, and enjoy beautiful views while I ran.

Stillness

I knew that in order to help my body feel comfortable enough to stop yelling at me, I had to show her that I would listen to her even when she whispered. So I started taking time to get quiet and listen. Before any tiny decision I had to make - even before deciding what type of tea to brew - I stopped to listen to my body and find out what she really wanted and needed. This practice extends to the challenge of setting boundaries - I have to take the time now to notice when a situation doesn't feel right, and give myself space to understand why and then speak up for myself as needed. As my nervous system has settled down over the past year, I have to remind myself to continue to take this time to stop and really listen to what my body needs, rather than just make the decisions I feel I "should" be making.

Since feeling more and more back to normal, it has been a challenge to prioritize the same level of self-care. I feel the busyness creeping up again, and it is ongoing work to remember that my own needs have to come first if I want to avoid falling back into the giant black hole of burnout.

What can you do if you think you might have burnout?

If you feel that you may be struggling with burnout, take time now to prioritize yourself and your healing:

• Find small practices that relax your nervous system, and make them non-negotiable.
• Shift your mindset from one that ties your worth to productivity, to one that values you for who you are.
• Get lots of rest - more than you think you need! So many of us have been surviving on as little sleep as we can manage for far too long. Our bodies tend to need 7-9 hours of sleep per night to be completely replenished. If you can't get that, make time to take a midday nap :)
• Take time away from screens. The normalization of constant overstimulation in the form of multitasking at work and home, continually scrolling social media feeds, and always having media at our disposal for entertainment, doesn't give our brains time to decompress. Give yourself a break from all the overwhelming input, and take time to gaze peacefully at a flower, or out at the ocean (bonus points if you remember to notice and slow your breathing while you're at it). Let yourself just be!

It's also a good idea to talk to a mental health provider. If you don't have coverage, start with your friendly neighbourhood yoga teacher and we can help you find some free resources. You are always welcome to email us at hello@kindsociety.ca. You can't pour from an empty cup, and the world deserves to benefit from your full and beautiful self.